Don't mind the scene-numbers :)
Summary
This story tells the tale of a boy named Victer Adelstraud who spends too much of his time on the internet.
One day the internet is inexplicably gone and Victer has no idea how to deal with it.
His caring mother sees that he has problems dealing with the situation so she calls in the help of a “self help guru” named Steve Awesome.
Steve takes Victer out into town in order to help him deal with his internet problems, social problems and just about everything else.
Victers cat Red baron joins them because he doesn’t trust the self help guru, the cat (who has ties with the mafia) plots to get rid of the guru by any means possible.
On this journey Victer not only discovers that he doesn’t need internet but also learns how to make friends even without the help of a so-called professional.
In the end Victer can still regularly be found on the internet but now knows there’s a whole world out there for him to discover.
The cat learns how to kill the guru.
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Opening Scene 1:
Goal:
- Introduce the characters
- Introduce the location
- Sketch Victer’s normal situation
- Throw Victer’s normal situation out of balance
Ext – house- Noon
We see a shot of the house.
Int – House – Noon
The camera follows mom trough the house from the hallway to the kitchen, where she drops the paper and picks up snacks for Victer.
In the background you see his sister talking on the phone like a teenager, as the camera moves on her sounds fades out to the left.
The camera continues to follow Victers mom up the stairs where several family photos are hanging, these photos are from different times in Victers life, the first photo still shows his dad and little VIcter happy, when the camera moves on the father disappears from the photos and Victer loosing interest in the family and becoming more obsessed with electronics like a gameboy.
We follow the mom all the way to Victers bedroom where she knocks on the door.
VIcter is totally absorbed by his computer and answers without looking away from the screen.
(Music is playing on the background)
Mom: “I brought you dinner honey”
Victer: (waving his hands towards a suitable spot) “Just put is down somewhere”
Victers mom puts the food on top of the cat.
Red baron: (speaking itallian) “Gracias fat woman”
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Scene 1.2
We see Victer typing franticly on his keyboard, the camera zooms in on his head with a little drool dripping down his chin and eventually we enter a dream sequence.
(dream sequence) ext –The big city – Nighttime.
We see shots of Victer as he would like to be.
He is riding through the city in a limo with beautiful girls surrounding him.
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Scene 1.3
We come out of the dream sequence and see him writing his blog.
The dream Victer can still be seen at the side of the screen where the dream sequence is still playing in a “Dream bubble”.
When Victer tries to post his blog entry he sees a screen showing an “could not open this page” error.
(The calm music stops abruptly)
We return to the side shot of Victer with a look of surprise and anger on his face, the Victer in the dream sequence is also surprised to see the entering the post doesn’t work, he looks at the screen over real Victers shoulder.
He is confused for a moment but then decides to fix the problem and heads downstairs.
We see a shot of him walking down the stairs and in a glimpse we see the photos of his family again.
He discovers his sister has been fiddling with the internet cable and sees its not properly connected.
VIcter: (shouting) “Keep your estrogen drenched hands of the cable!”
With the look of a job well done and a little annoyance on his face he reconnects the cable and returns to his room.
He sits down with a satisfied sigh and refreshes the page but again he gets the “Could not open this page” error.
Unable to cope with what just he happened he stares at the screen, his eye twitching a little, trying to make sense of what just happen.
Red baron(speaking Italian in a “non care” tone) “this wont end well”
He runs downstairs towards the modem and again tries to reconnect the cable, in his panic he continues to do this about 20 times, his face becoming more desperate at every attempt.
A couple of minutes have passed and Victer is lying in the corner of the living room in a fetal position, we see the moon and the sun change position in the sky through a window, indicating that a few days have passed.
We see Victer’s mother looking at him with a concerned look on her face, she reaches for the phone.
A couple of hours later the doorbell rings.
Victer’s mom opens the door.
A man with a huge perfectly white smile is at the door, he introduces himself with a sickening enthusiasm.
Steve Awesome: “Good day dear sir/Madame! My name is Steve AWESOME, writer of such luminous books as: “15 ways to be successful while setting yourself on fire.
“I am here to help your child/husband become more confident!, now where is the problem?”
Victors mom leads Steve into the room where Victer is still curled op like a fetus sniffling almost to the point of crying, there is some half eaten food still lying around Victer.
Steve Awesome: Hi there! I’m Steve AWESOME!\
As Steve says this a handful of angels on ropes descend from the heavens and sing a heavenly song.
One of them has a faulty rope and smacks to the ground before bouncing straight up again.
Writer of such awesome books like “From your head to her pants!” I am here to help you discover your own inner awesome!
“So I hear from your mother? Well you’ve come to the right guy!
In a few easy steps, as described in my book “How to do things, the AWESOME way!”, availably through amazone.com, I will shape you into the man I am today!.......AWESOME.
“Now lets get out there and do this!”
Red Baron: (speaking Italian )”This manperson is highly annoying, I shall keep my eye on him.”
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Scene 2
Ext – The streets (bad side of the neighborhood) – Late afternoon
Steve and Victer are walking along the street, Red Baron is following them.
Steve: “You see man, to be awesome you have to be able to shine your awesome on everybody you meet, we’ll start you off easy.”
See those fellas there at the basketball court?”
Steve points to a group of people selling drugs on the basketball court.
Red Baron: (silently in the background) “This humanperson looks completely insane, I shall go and seek advice from the family.”
Red Baron walks off.
Victer: (in a hesitant tone of voice) “I don’t think that’s such a good idea….I’m not really a people person. Real people that is. “
Steve: (yelling) “You go over there and shine your awesome! GO!”
Victer (with a scared look on his face) “Hi don’t you think “Sodae” is hot.
Gangster: “What did you just say about my moma??” (He steps aside revealing a little old lady standing between the gangsters’
Victer: “Ow no, I didn’t mean!”
Victer gets punched in the face immediately and flies into the garbage.
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Steve: “What was that??? I did not see any awesome! I didn’t smell any awesome! I couldn’t even taste the awesome!
Victer: (sarcastically) “Yeah the awesome was surely lacking.”
Steve: “Okay forget this, I’ve got a lot of awesome things for you to do!
Victer: (in a hesitant tone) “Like?.....”
Steve: “You’ll see!”
Red Baron (who by this point has returned) “So it is decided, I shall continue with the plan”
Red Baron makes shakes his paw towards Steve and licks it.”
We cut to a montage of pictures Victer (Red Baron can be found in the background):
- Steve takes Victer shooting a bow and arrow but Victer misses the target and kills 5 endangered species. (Like an owl, koala etc.”
- They also try paintball, but Victer doesn’t know how it works without a mouse.
- Same thing happens when they try playing chess.
- Steve also takes Victer shopping but when they try to pay Victer franticly looks for a place to enter his paypall number, when he doesn’t find it he just stares at the girl at the register.
At this point the montage ends and we see Steve Victer standing in the same place as before the montage.
Steve: (Looking puzzled and not paying any attention to Victer.) “Well, that didn’t go as good as I wanted, I didn’t really go at all.”
Victer: “See? That’s what you get when you remove me from my comfort zone.”
Steve;”Please lower your noise levels while I figure out what to do next.”
Victer gives a very annoyed sigh.
Steve: “Ah screw this noise, we’ll just do it.”
Victer: “Do what?”
Steve: “Vic, my man, my buddy, I’m going to take you clubbing for some advanced awesome!”
Victer: “Advanced awesome??”
Steve: “You’re going to learn how to pick up the ladies!”
Victer opens his mouth as if he wants to say something but realizes it wont make any difference so he decides not to say anything.
He throws his hands in the and just walks home.
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Scene 3
Int – Dining room – Early evening.
Mom and sis are sitting at the diner table eating food that just has been prepared, Victer comes walking in and walks straight past them.
Mom: “Hey honey how did it go? Sit down have some food.”
Victer: “Nah I’ve got to che (stops mid sentence realizing again internet Is gone)” ah okay what are we eating?”
Mom: “Meatloaf with potatoes and gravy”
Victer: “Sounds ehh….What?”
Mom: “You’ll love it” (Puts the food on Victers plate.”) “So how did it go?”
Victer (while anxiously eating the food) “Steve’s a very strange guy, he made me talk to some people who were speaking a strange foreign language.
(Talking with his mouth full) “Tonight were going out (stops mid sentence) (surprised look) hmmm this is some good eatin!
Mom: “And its healthy!”
Victer: (Still with his mouth full) That’s an added bonus.”
Mom: “But tonight you’re? ...
Victer: “Were going out to impress some girls”
Sis bursts out into laughter
Mom: “That’s nice, I’m sure my baby boy can get any girl he wants.” “We do need to dress you up nicely though.
Sis is still laughing uncontrollably, sometimes stopping and gasping for air and then starts laughing again.
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Scene 4
Ext – House – night
Steve is standing besides a cab waiting for Victer
Steve: “Hi there! You ready to get into some pants?!”
VIcter: “What?”
Steve: “No nothing, here drink some of this!” (In a smooth move he pulls a bottle of whiskey out of his coat)
Victer: (looks at the bottle) “Whisky?”
Steve:”Yeah! Whisky is sweetness! Now drink up”
Victer: “How much?”
Steve: “Drink till it makes you feel good! “
Victer: “You don’t want any?”
Steve: “Nah I’ve had three bottles on my way over here, now let’s go!”
The cab drives off just as Red Baron enters the screen dragging the head of horse, he looks around but doesn’t see Steve of Victer.
He decides to follow the cab dragging the head with him.
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Ext – House – night
Steve is standing besides a cab waiting for Victer
Steve: “Hi there! You ready to get into some pants?!”
VIcter: “What?”
Steve: “No nothing, here drink some of this!” (In a smooth move he pulls a bottle of whiskey out of his coat)
Victer: (looks at the bottle) “Whisky?”
Steve:”Yeah! Whisky is sweetness! Now drink up”
Victer: “How much?”
Steve: “Drink till it makes you feel good! “
Victer: “You don’t want any?”
Steve: “Nah I’ve had three bottles on my way over here, now let’s go!”
The cab drives off just as Red Baron enters the screen dragging the head of horse, he looks around but doesn’t see Steve of Victer.
He decides to follow the cab dragging the head with him.
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Scene 5
Ext – Nightclub - Night
Victer and Steve drive up to the entrance to the nightclub.
Victer: “You know…ehh ughnl this stuff is teh roxorz……(He holds the bottle upside down to show its empty.)
Steve: “Don’t worry man, there’s a lot more inside!”
Victer: (Drunkish) “Okay lets go…hiccup”
Red baron walks into the screen schlepping the horse’s head, he’s exhausted of dragging it so far.
Steve and Victer enter the nightclub, there’s loud trance music playing.
Steve: “C’mon Vic, lets see your dancing skills.”
Victer falls to the dance floor and performs Colin’s bear dance moves, the rest of the dancers make a circle around him and give him a strange look.
Steve’s sees Victer is failing miserably at dancing so he walks over to the dance floor and pulls Victer aside.
Steve: “What was that man? That wasn’t even close to being awesome, try harder to be awesome.
Victer: “Those were some of my best moves”
Steve: “Dammit man, I thought you might have picked up some things about now, you really need to read my book “Dancing in order to fornicate” (he turns to a woman standing next to them and whispers: “available at amazone.com and at my place.”
He gives her a little wink before turning to Victer again.
“Okay fine, let’s try picking up a girl, but I could use a good laugh.”
Steve scans the room for the most attractive and hard to get woman, he sees a somewhat older woman (30ish) sitting on a couch.
Steve (Whispering to himself) “Perfect, this should be fun.”
Steve: “Check that chick”
Victer: “blughuh”
Steve: “try to get her phone number.”
“VIcter: “Uhghuh….okay”
Victer stumbles towards the girl and falls into the seat next to her.
Victer: “Hi, I’m…blurp.Victer, I like you’re ugh dress.”
Girl: “Thank you.”
Victer: “I like your big boobs and I cannot lie.”
Girl: “Ehh…thanks again, so what brings you here ehm..? “
Victer: “My name is Victer and I like blogging.”
Girl: Nice to meet you Victer, so wha?” (Victer interrupts her.)
Victer (in a drunken manner): “This guy Steve, my mother called him, hiccup, called him so he could help me with the troubles I’ve had since I lost internet."
“I was happy when I was on the internet you know, I had fans, friends, some of them even female! But because of this weird notion that everything is the freaking bees knees outside I’ve been hurt, killed numerous endangered species and got paint shot in my face.”
Now where is the fun in that?
“The worst thing about it that those things are just the tip of the proverbial iceberg”
Girl: “So there’s more?”
Victer: “a lot more, like…..”
We see Victer telling her about his day and all that he went through, we don’t hear them talking, we only hear the music and see his mouth moving
.The scene fades to black
Ext – Nightclub - Night
Victer and Steve drive up to the entrance to the nightclub.
Victer: “You know…ehh ughnl this stuff is teh roxorz……(He holds the bottle upside down to show its empty.)
Steve: “Don’t worry man, there’s a lot more inside!”
Victer: (Drunkish) “Okay lets go…hiccup”
Red baron walks into the screen schlepping the horse’s head, he’s exhausted of dragging it so far.
Steve and Victer enter the nightclub, there’s loud trance music playing.
Steve: “C’mon Vic, lets see your dancing skills.”
Victer falls to the dance floor and performs Colin’s bear dance moves, the rest of the dancers make a circle around him and give him a strange look.
Steve’s sees Victer is failing miserably at dancing so he walks over to the dance floor and pulls Victer aside.
Steve: “What was that man? That wasn’t even close to being awesome, try harder to be awesome.
Victer: “Those were some of my best moves”
Steve: “Dammit man, I thought you might have picked up some things about now, you really need to read my book “Dancing in order to fornicate” (he turns to a woman standing next to them and whispers: “available at amazone.com and at my place.”
He gives her a little wink before turning to Victer again.
“Okay fine, let’s try picking up a girl, but I could use a good laugh.”
Steve scans the room for the most attractive and hard to get woman, he sees a somewhat older woman (30ish) sitting on a couch.
Steve (Whispering to himself) “Perfect, this should be fun.”
Steve: “Check that chick”
Victer: “blughuh”
Steve: “try to get her phone number.”
“VIcter: “Uhghuh….okay”
Victer stumbles towards the girl and falls into the seat next to her.
Victer: “Hi, I’m…blurp.Victer, I like you’re ugh dress.”
Girl: “Thank you.”
Victer: “I like your big boobs and I cannot lie.”
Girl: “Ehh…thanks again, so what brings you here ehm..? “
Victer: “My name is Victer and I like blogging.”
Girl: Nice to meet you Victer, so wha?” (Victer interrupts her.)
Victer (in a drunken manner): “This guy Steve, my mother called him, hiccup, called him so he could help me with the troubles I’ve had since I lost internet."
“I was happy when I was on the internet you know, I had fans, friends, some of them even female! But because of this weird notion that everything is the freaking bees knees outside I’ve been hurt, killed numerous endangered species and got paint shot in my face.”
Now where is the fun in that?
“The worst thing about it that those things are just the tip of the proverbial iceberg”
Girl: “So there’s more?”
Victer: “a lot more, like…..”
We see Victer telling her about his day and all that he went through, we don’t hear them talking, we only hear the music and see his mouth moving
.The scene fades to black
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Scene 6
Int – Victer’s bedroom – Midday.
We see Victer waking up in his bed, slowly opening his eye’s. (We see this through his eyes, the background is still a little blurry and there is a loud beep in his ear.)
Victer: (grabbing his head) “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah aaaaah”
Victer slowly walks down the stairs grabbing his head.
He walks past his mom.
Mom: “Everything alright honey?” (The sounds Victer hears are really dampened and sounds like everything is underwater, this slowly gets better as the scene progresses.)
Victer: “Ssssshhhhh mom, (mumbling) my head is broken I think.”
Mom: “What happend?”
Victer: “I can’t remember."
There’s a ring at the door.
Victers mom opens the door and yells for Victer.
Mom: “Victer! Its for you!”
Victer: “AAAAH” (He grabs his head)
Victer slowly walks to the door and sees Steve standing there.”
Steve: “Hi Vic! You ready for another day of sweet sweet awesome?”
Victer: (Still grabbing his head) “No, not really” “What the hell happened last night?”
Steve: “Not that much, though I might have picked up a disease or two.” “You ready?”
Victer: “Well no.”
Steve: “LETS GO MAN!! GO GO GO HURAH
Victer gives Steve a very annoyed and angry look and slams the door close in Steve’s face, Steve falls from the steps and lands in a pretty painful position”
Red Baron walks into the frame and slowly drags Steve away.”
Victer walks back into the living room and picks up a cup of coffee on his way back to his chair.
When he passes the phone it suddenly rings and Victor throws the coffee through the room.
He picks up the phone.
Victer: “Hello, this is Victer.”
Lady: “Hi Victer, my name is Bianca smith, you might not remember me, seeing as you were drunk out of your face but we met at the bar last night.”
“But that doesn’t really matter, I found your blog and I like your writing style.”
Victer: “I told you about my blog?”
Lady: “You told me just about everything.”
Victer: “Ah, sorry about that.”
Lady: “No no, that’s okay, I actually enjoyed your stories, the true ones anyway.
“You see, I’m an editor for a pretty big magazine and I think your stories would fit perfectly into our lifestyle section.”
“Victer: “Really? You think my writing is good enough to be published?”
Lady: “I do.”
Victer: “Awesome! “So what do you want me to do?”
Lady: “I need you to go out, experience some things and write them down, we’ll print those the next issue and we’ll see how people like them.”
Victer: “(hesitantly) I don’t know, I´m not really fond of the outdoors.”
Lady: “That’s exactly why we want you, Vic, this is a great opportunity for you, don’t spoil it because people make you feel like shit.
That’s what people do, and now you have a chance of getting back a them with your stories, a preemptive kick in the balls so to speak.”
Victer: “Okay, I’ll give it a shot, it probably cant get any worse then when I was with Steve.”
Lady: “Well I certainly hope it does, makes for interesting reading you see.”
“Just Give me a call when your done.”
Victer: “I’ll give it my best.”
Victer: “Bye.”
Lady: “Bye.”
We zoom in on VIcters face and see that, although he’s still a little afraid, he kind of likes the idea of going out.
We see a action movie montage where we see Steve getting his coat and zipping it up, getting his camera and putting in a tape and picking up his Thunderbirds lunchbox.
He stands in the doorway and gives a little sigh before walking through the door.
End Credits.
In the credits we see pictures of Steve’s new adventures.
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Int – Victer’s bedroom – Midday.
We see Victer waking up in his bed, slowly opening his eye’s. (We see this through his eyes, the background is still a little blurry and there is a loud beep in his ear.)
Victer: (grabbing his head) “Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah aaaaah”
Victer slowly walks down the stairs grabbing his head.
He walks past his mom.
Mom: “Everything alright honey?” (The sounds Victer hears are really dampened and sounds like everything is underwater, this slowly gets better as the scene progresses.)
Victer: “Ssssshhhhh mom, (mumbling) my head is broken I think.”
Mom: “What happend?”
Victer: “I can’t remember."
There’s a ring at the door.
Victers mom opens the door and yells for Victer.
Mom: “Victer! Its for you!”
Victer: “AAAAH” (He grabs his head)
Victer slowly walks to the door and sees Steve standing there.”
Steve: “Hi Vic! You ready for another day of sweet sweet awesome?”
Victer: (Still grabbing his head) “No, not really” “What the hell happened last night?”
Steve: “Not that much, though I might have picked up a disease or two.” “You ready?”
Victer: “Well no.”
Steve: “LETS GO MAN!! GO GO GO HURAH
Victer gives Steve a very annoyed and angry look and slams the door close in Steve’s face, Steve falls from the steps and lands in a pretty painful position”
Red Baron walks into the frame and slowly drags Steve away.”
Victer walks back into the living room and picks up a cup of coffee on his way back to his chair.
When he passes the phone it suddenly rings and Victor throws the coffee through the room.
He picks up the phone.
Victer: “Hello, this is Victer.”
Lady: “Hi Victer, my name is Bianca smith, you might not remember me, seeing as you were drunk out of your face but we met at the bar last night.”
“But that doesn’t really matter, I found your blog and I like your writing style.”
Victer: “I told you about my blog?”
Lady: “You told me just about everything.”
Victer: “Ah, sorry about that.”
Lady: “No no, that’s okay, I actually enjoyed your stories, the true ones anyway.
“You see, I’m an editor for a pretty big magazine and I think your stories would fit perfectly into our lifestyle section.”
“Victer: “Really? You think my writing is good enough to be published?”
Lady: “I do.”
Victer: “Awesome! “So what do you want me to do?”
Lady: “I need you to go out, experience some things and write them down, we’ll print those the next issue and we’ll see how people like them.”
Victer: “(hesitantly) I don’t know, I´m not really fond of the outdoors.”
Lady: “That’s exactly why we want you, Vic, this is a great opportunity for you, don’t spoil it because people make you feel like shit.
That’s what people do, and now you have a chance of getting back a them with your stories, a preemptive kick in the balls so to speak.”
Victer: “Okay, I’ll give it a shot, it probably cant get any worse then when I was with Steve.”
Lady: “Well I certainly hope it does, makes for interesting reading you see.”
“Just Give me a call when your done.”
Victer: “I’ll give it my best.”
Victer: “Bye.”
Lady: “Bye.”
We zoom in on VIcters face and see that, although he’s still a little afraid, he kind of likes the idea of going out.
We see a action movie montage where we see Steve getting his coat and zipping it up, getting his camera and putting in a tape and picking up his Thunderbirds lunchbox.
He stands in the doorway and gives a little sigh before walking through the door.
End Credits.
In the credits we see pictures of Steve’s new adventures.
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Scene 7
Ext – Docks – Night
We see a shoe and and pants sticking a little out of the water, the same shoe and pants worn by Steve, he is floating dead in the water.
We see Red Baron standing there with other cats behind him in a V formation.
The screen goes to black.
Ext – Docks – Night
We see a shoe and and pants sticking a little out of the water, the same shoe and pants worn by Steve, he is floating dead in the water.
We see Red Baron standing there with other cats behind him in a V formation.
The screen goes to black.
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